Chapter 27
That girl, I didn't know it yet, but she was gonna change my whole story. She was gonna flip my world upside down and expand my horizons in a way I never even knew I needed. I'd never been into girls, never even thought about it. It never crossed my mind. But she ended up becoming a close friend of mine down the line. And that friendship started like this, in a weird, almost wrong way, with her spying on me in the bathroom.
You know when two people wanna be friends, but neither one is any good at it? When they're just standing there, staring at each other, wanting to talk, but the silence weighs heavier than any words? That's how it was. Me, who could barely look people in the eye for more than two seconds, and her, who seemed just the same in that department.
When I asked her name, she glanced at herself in the mirror, like she was trying to play it cool, but I could tell it was just nerves. The same nerves I was feeling.
"Valquíria, but just call me Val, I hate my name."
"Val... Okay, but Valquíria's a beautiful name. I wish I was named Joana, like Joan of Arc!"
"Oh my God, that's so cheesy, girl!" She turned to me, laughing lightly, but her eyes still a bit scared. "And yours, what's it?"
"Nicole..." I answered awkwardly, staring at the floor, feeling my cheeks burn.
"What a cute name!"
And we stood there the whole rest of the class period, having this awkward conversation, trying to steer clear of the masturbation topic, sizing each other up without knowing how far we could go without it getting embarrassing. It felt like neither of us had much in the way of social skills, like we both carried the same weight of not knowing how to connect without it seeming off. But she asked to swap phone numbers and said she'd text me. And me, who never gave out my number to anyone, I gave it to her. Because deep down, I wanted her friendship, I wanted to get texts from a friend.
And she texted.
All day long, the messages kept coming, and I kept replying, and things turned sexual real quick. She told me she'd been with a guy since she was fourteen and never hooked up with any other boy, but that guy didn't want anything to do with her anymore. She said she wasn't addicted to masturbating, but lately she didn't know what had gotten into her, that she was watching too much porn and jerking off out of control, and that she got so turned on doing it in unusual places like buses, school bathrooms, and... other people's houses.
That gave me this weird, almost painful arousal. I'd never done anything like that. Masturbating was still just medicine for me. It was the only way I knew to keep the whole emptiness from swallowing me up. I told her things on the surface, never going deep. I didn't tell her about the three guys, didn't mention Jonathan, or the emptiness that hit after every orgasm, or the guilt that punched me like a fist. I lied and said I only masturbated twice a week, that I was doing it because I was in my fertile period. Pure bullshit, so I wouldn't seem as broken as I felt.
The texting with her got cut off by Lucas, the guy who sat next to me. Without realizing it, I'd spent the rest of the period with my phone in hand, swapping messages with her during class.
"Nicole?"
Lucas's voice snapped me back to the classroom like a slap. I blinked, my phone still warm in my hand, Val's messages blinking unread on the screen. My face burned right away—not from embarrassment about having my phone out in class, but because I'd spent the last few minutes texting her about getting horny in public places, while he was talking right next to me and I hadn't even listened.
"Girl, the assignment today, where we doing it?"
"What assignment?"
"The teacher just assigned a group project. What's up with you? You showed up late, skipped class, and now you won't put down your phone."
I was surprised someone was actually paying attention to me. No one ever noticed anything. And then the curiosity hit: was he jealous? There was a little edge to his tone, like he didn't like seeing me distracted by someone else. Or maybe it was just my imagination. My heart did this little flip, but I played it off with an awkward laugh.
"Nah, nothing, I just made a new friend and we're gossiping," I said, shoving my phone in my jeans pocket, feeling the fabric brush against the sensitive skin of my belly. "About the assignment... we can do it after class, in the library or whatever, anywhere."
"Can we do it at your place?" he asked, leaning in a bit. "The school computers suck and I only got my phone... you got a computer, right?"
"Yeah, I do," I replied, thinking fast. My dad was traveling again, house empty. Jonathan had practice after school. Perfect. "Let's head straight there. We can grab food on the street and do the work at my house."
He smiled, one of those shy smiles he gave when he scored something.
"Cool. Meet you at the exit then?"
"Sure."
He grabbed his backpack and headed out, and I sat there for another second. My clit was still throbbing low from the interrupted masturbation in the bathroom, my damp panties sticking to my skin, my whole body restless. The idea of bringing Lucas home—someone not family, someone normal—gave me butterflies mixed with heat. It wasn't just the assignment; it was the chance something might happen.
I slowly packed my notebook into my backpack, feeling that emptiness that always came after an interrupted conversation. I pulled out my phone again. Val had sent another message:
"So? Wanna plan a day to hang out?"
I smiled to myself, biting my lip. I texted back quick:
"Yeah, definitely, just not today, I'm heading home with a guy to do homework. I'll tell you later."
I hit send. And put my phone away.